General Hospital Commentary: Only murderers in the building

Drew woke up and quickly pointed suspicion in Michael’s direction, but is his plan doomed to fail because there are so many suspects? Now that Britt is back and reunited with her mother, will Liesl get to the bottom of what kept Britt from her? Let’s discuss all the twists and turns an all-new General Hospital commentary for the week ending September 12, 2025.

Dear readers, when Anna and Dante started making their murder board, I was afraid they’d need five whiteboards to list everyone in Port Charles who wanted Drew dead. It would be easier to list the people who don’t want him dead on General Hospital. He is reviled throughout Port Charles.

Drew Cain: 1, Grim Reaper: 0

But here’s the thing. Drew is not dead. He’s not even in a coma anymore. Nor is he paralyzed despite the hints that he might be. We were only free from him for two days. If you hoped maybe he’d wake up as a kinder, gentler guy, your hopes have been dashed. He woke up from a near death experience with zero lessons learned and was immediately ready to do some more lying and scheming.

Maybe Drew and Willow DO deserve each other. Willow didn’t even flinch when Drew outlined his plan to frame Michael for his shooting. The same Michael who sat by Willow’s bedside for months while she was dying of cancer. The Michael who invited her to be Wiley’s mom after her own baby died. The steamy, studly Michael who still looks at her with soulful, longing eyes. Sigh. Dreamy, dreamy Michael. ❤

Drew spins a web of hope for Willow

Willow swore to Liz that she hates Drew and insisted that she’s only faking being back together with him to get her kids. But readers, that’s an extremely unconvincing performance Willow is giving. I’m not buying it.  I think she is still deeply trapped in Drew’s spider web. Drew’s total obsession with Willow is super creepy to me. Drew was with Sam. He was with Kim. He was with Carly. But then one taste of Willow and he goes INSANE? It doesn’t track for me.

Why did General Hospital set up a perfect murder mystery but then skip the murder? We have a list of suspects a mile long, and clearly the viewers were very excited about the possibility of a whodunnit after months of torturing us with Drew’s increasingly evil antics.

My husband who pretends he doesn’t watch General Hospital 

My husband who pretends he doesn’t watch General Hospital, asked me to tweet his theory to all of you. I did, and he had over 20,000 views and over 1400 engagements. Maybe he should take over this column. But then he’d have to watch every single scene every day and take notes. He’s more of a walk through the room, dip in and pass judgment kind of viewer. His theory is that General Hospital will discover that Drew’s current blood type doesn’t match his past medical records and that he isn’t the real Drew. He’s calling him Patient #7.

For a guy who doesn’t watch General Hospital he sure has great recall of previous plotlines…

Who do you think shot Drew? Alexis? Michael? Willow? Kristina? Danny? I kind of love the idea of Jason’s son being the shooter, thinking he was saving Scout, but that would be too dark. Curtis? Martin? Sidwell? He’s been strangely quiet, ay?

I am excited to see this play out even though I wish Drew had stayed in a coma slightly longer. Maybe it was Aunt Liesl helping Nina and Willow out. I could get behind that one, too.

But – The Britch is back!

So, Dr. O has much more important things to focus on now. When Liesl saw the sweet face of her dear Britta, the shock made her faint in General Hospital’s lobby.

Side story: toured in a reparatory theatre group when I was young. I had a role in one play where I had to faint, night after night. Now I’m in my 60’s and the side of my body where I used to stage faint hurt me all the time. I am so glad someone caught Liesl before she hit the ground because I don’t want Kathleen Gati to have a sore shoulder like I do. Ha.

Is Faison’s brain in a jar?

Liesl will be preoccupied trying to determine why her daughter played dead for two years and tracking down Faison. I know what you’re thinking, ‘It can’t be Faison, his brain is in a jar!’ Jack Brennan mentioned that fact this week with the gusto of Gilmore Girls‘ Jess asking Rory, “Why did you drop out of Yale!”

But all brains look alike, we don’t really know the jar brain is Cesar’s. The best part of soaps is that they are soapy. Unpredictably sudsy. The writers sometimes craft totally campy and implausible storylines and I lap it up like Willow laps up Drew’s empty promises.

I couldn’t care less if Faison’s brain was in a jar. Bring him back! The whole nutty Faison offspring too – Nathan, Britt and even Peter August — because then Maxie can wake up from her coma to Spinelli, Nathan, and Peter all pining for her. Wouldn’t that be a magically soapalicious way to cap off 2025?

If it’s not Faison, then who? Jerry Jacks? Pasqual? Sidwell? Victor Cassadine? (Why not, he was probably only mostly dead, too) but I pity whichever villain kept Britt away from her Mutter.

Meine liebe

The mother/daughter reunion was magical – Kathleen Gati reacted the way I would react if one of my parents showed up alive in the room with me years after I thought I had lost them. She gave us all the emotion we needed to see, all the wonder in her eyes of a walking, breathing miracle. 

Ms. Gati truly a spectacular actress. Just like Bradford Anderson in the role of Spinelli, another character sometimes played for comic relief, every now and then they let those quirky characters be fully immersed in drama and they never disappoint. I hope Ms. Gati submits these scenes for the Emmy’s next year. But then the sweet reunion turned sour.

Kelly Thiebaud is a sight for sore eyes and I’m so glad she is back home in Port Charles. Britt will be recovering from the from slap on the face Obrecht gave her daughter after she realized Britt faked her own death for a while. Maybe she can get some Deception cover up for the palm shaped mark on her cheek.

Rocco will soon have some answers

Britt’s return didn’t just shock Liesl, Lulu and Dante are spiraling after seeing the woman who gave birth to Rocco in General Hospital. And when Britt called Rocco “Ben” I thought Lulu’s hair might stand up on top of her head like in the cartoons.

All of Dante and Lulu’s fears have come to life, and Rocco will now get to meet Britt in person and make up his own mind about her. And you know what? Just like Spencer Cassadine before him, I predict Rocco is going to like having Britt in his life.  She’s non-judgmental and will instantly love him because he’s the boy she gave birth to. This is going to complicate Dante and Lulu’s family dynamic. But that isn’t the only shock they got this week.

More trouble on the horizon 

Readers, I don’t care what derogatory words my dear friend Dan tosses my way. Valentin is back and I am thrilled. Valentin is a honey. He’s my soap crush. But sadly, my imaginary soap boyfriend is still stuck in Steinmauer. Also, he’s sporting a moustache that looks like his disguise when he was trying to seduce Jennifer Smith.

Lulu and Dante will need serious therapy now that Valentin and Britt are back in their kid’s lives.

I have high hopes. Jack Brennan needs Valentin, and he’s willing to cut deals to enlist Valentin’s assistance. Also, we know without a doubt that Charlotte, (now played by the lovely Bluesy Burke,) will definitely find a way to see her Papa. Will Valentin eventually get sprung from life imprisonment? Absolutely. 

Part of me is still rooting for Anna and Valentin to reunite, but the other part of me thinks this might be the perfect time for a Valentin and Nina reunion. I don’t care who he dates as long as he is back, and I can look at him every day. And maybe he will play the piano. (Swoon)

Friends in low places

It’s a pity that Ric is tied up at Alexis’ house, because there is legal work galore in Port Charles right now. Ric could double his client list in one trip to General Hospital.

One good thing this storyline has wrought is the off-kilter frenemies duo of Ava and Kristina. Watching the two of them forced to work together with a touch of Alexis sprinkled in has been sublime. But seriously, put Maura West with anyone and it’s instantly a better scene. She and Jane Elliot both have that magical power of elevating anyone they partner with onscreen.

Yes, call Brad!

Readers, I love Liz (Webber) Baldwin, she’s one of my favorite characters. I usually agree with her on things, but this time, not so much. Liz! Let Lucas call Brad! He deserves to know that Britt is home and who else will tell him? Plus, Marco is up to his eyeballs in Sidwell’s shady business dealings, and Lucas is too good for that. 

Rebecca Herbst and Van Hansis have wonderful onscreen chemistry in the Liz and Lucas scenes. I am really enjoying their budding friendship.

Brick is back too

I was also glad to see Brick today. Knowing that Brick made it look like Drew bribed the judge to give Michael custody is a genius move by Sonny, the dimpled wonder. I am so glad he thought of that. Surely Brick was savvy enough not to be caught, right? Sidwell will be furious when his dirty deed gets boomeranged back on his shady congressman.

Readers, did anyone else get the vague feeling that Brick might swing by General Hospital and try to finish the job the shooter bungled?

The Land Down Under

Meanwhile in an Australian beach bungalow, Jr. Agent Joss Jacks and her handler “Mystery first name” Vaughn are surfing and making love because near death is a turn on for them. Something that Carly has done in the past, so Joss comes by that honestly. When Brennan busted in and they both popped up in bed with guns drawn, I laughed so hard I spit my peach tea out of my mouth. Vaughn looks so much like the last Jagger that I sometimes wonder if he will end up being Jagger’s son who’s been playing Joss the whole time to solve his dad’s murder.

Joss and Vaughn are both in big spy trouble now, and Jack said they will face consequences. Like what? What sort of spy trouble can you get into? I have seen every James Bond movie. When he’s in trouble, he disappears and ends up in bed with some honey in some exotic place with a vesper until it blows over.

Jason reads Anna the riot act

Jason is furious with Anna for manipulating him into going to Five Poppies and the two have a heart-to-heart talk about the choices they both made and wished they didn’t that lead them to the lives they sometimes regret. Every now and then I feel like the writers are going to have them kiss, but then I think about Jason and Robin being together and say “Ewww.” But in real life, there is only a ten-year gap in their ages, so it would be perfectly appropriate for them to date. 

However, I think Jason and Britt are going to get back together if she can get over his tattoos and the fact he left her to help Carly. I hope they don’t stretch the reunion out forever, because the waiting gets so boring after a while.

Here’s to you Mrs. Robinson

Across town, Portia had a one-night stand with Dr. Gannon after Curtis walked out on her. Mind you, Curtis never said their marriage was over, Portia did. “If you walk out right now it means…” is not really a definitive state of a marriage in my humble opinion. My husband and I have been married 27 years, and I can’t count how many times one of us has said, “If you blah blah blah again, we are done!” But we are never done and neither of us has immediately gone and slept with someone after such a fight. We’d have to leave the house and gas up our car and such.

Our church had a marriage retreat, and they asked couples with long marriages to share their secret, and we said we are still together because we are both too lazy to break up. We got the laugh we wanted. 

But not Portia. Man, before the door was even closed after Curtis walked out, she was ready for business with Isaiah. But now that Drew has been shot and Curtis and Portia are both potential suspects, Curtis told his wife that they need to play happily married as to not arouse suspicion. As soon as Curtis finds out she cheated, he should go sleep with Jordan since Portia has been accusing him of having something going on with Jordan for weeks. They don’t even know that their beautiful daughter Trina and Kai were in Drew’s house the night of the shooting and heard the entire thing unfold.

The writers sure changed Kai’s mind about Drew in an instant. Maybe our furious anger over his betrayal mattered?

Stand by me

Outback is missing, Emma is getting deeper and deeper into Professor Dalton’s shady research and yet she still found the time to be a good friend to Trina. Since Joss is otherwise engaged, I am glad to see this new friendship forming. Trina and Emma are on track to be true friends. I wonder how Trina will feel when she finds out Joss is a spy and didn’t tell her?

When Carly discovers that Joss killed Cyrus and got dragged into the WSB by Brennan I can’t imagine her taking that very well.  She is convinced he would never lie to her but lie to her is all he has done since the day he recruited her daughter. Will Jason break his word to Joss and tell his BFF everything? I doubt it. He’s actually a trustworthy guy.

What will happen tomorrow dear readers?

Will Drew put a dog tracking chip on Scout so the next time she runs away from him he can find her? Will Cody start charging Tracy extra to collect and care for random children who show up in his barn?

Can Ric break free of his prison and take his $10,000,000 and run off to Five Poppies? Will Spinelli be impressed that Jason hacked an exploding ankle bracelet? Will Professor Dalton do experiments on Outback?

Is Steinmauer going to give Valentin a razor, so he doesn’t frighten Charlotte with his facial hair when she visits? Will Anna stock up on white boards and erasable markers for the next attempt on Drew’s life? Are Michael and Jacinda going to pretend to be boyfriend/girlfriend to sell their alibi?

Will Brooke Lynn take kindly to Chase sniffing around Willow every day? Will Terry be super happy to get her Co-Chief of Staff Britt back since Portia is too busy covering up her crimes to be of any help?

Are we going to get a remix of the way Britt sashayed into General Hospital? Will Rocco’s badass eye stitches get him a hot date?? Will we ever see Professor Dalton again, or will he be missing for three weeks again while other characters discuss his research?

Are Joss and Vaughn book a room at the Five Poppies for their honeymoon when they get married for real?

Are you a Beyond the Gates fan an unaware that Dan J Kroll is writing a Two Scoops style column about it? Will you head over and check out his latest offering, Sex as a weapon?

Only tomorrow knows dear readers and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

Tamilu